// Time will tell.

On a Monday, I am waiting.
Tuesday, I am fading.
And by Wednesday, I can't sleep.

ALOHA! Hawaii was beautiful and it was great to spend a week with family, but nothing beats home. Even just walking through Vancouver International Airport made me tear up. Everything is so much better in Kanada. Clean streets, less crime, cheaper McDonald's, and low obesity factor. Absolutely amazing.

But yes, my welcoming party consisted of Matt and Dyllan picking me up. Then we went to McDonald's and then drove around. Actually, I drove around. ISN'T THAT SO RAD?! Matt let me drive his car. Actually, I just drove it around the Anderson parking lot, but hey, you can't complain when you haven't got a car of your own. IT WAS SO FUN! But apparently now, I am grounded from driving Speedy Reidy until I have gotten rid of my N license. That's alright. Hopefully, I'll have my own car by then. :D

Man, it feels good to be home. I missed everyone so much. LOVE.

// The Sun Is Back, And So Is Stephanie! Coincidence? I Think Not!

Gone, (gone) like Frank Sinatra
(gone) like Elvis and his mom
(gone) like Al Pachino's cash

Stephanie and Brendon came back yesterday night at midnight, and they brought back the sun! I've noticed something, when a friend leaves the province, something gets screwed up. For example, the Vancouver Canucks were on top of their game and up 3-1 in their playoff series against the Minisota Wild. But Matt Glynn and Becky went on their honeymoon and left the province. BOOM! The Canucks lose their next four games and are out of the playoffs. Last Saturday when Stephanie left, it was pouring rain. The weather never got any better until today, when they got back!!!! Isn't that so weird! But anywho, I missed them Ips...

The past 24 hours have been full of good crazieness, I'm loving it. I can't explainon a blog, so ask me!

// Disapointing Birthday

Birthday's are suposed to be full of good times. You should be able to have a party and just rock on! For me, this year will mark a disapointing birthday... A birthday with no party, and we aren't even going out for food, we're eating at home. I have been ofered to have a couple friends over but ever since last years embarising party, I've decided home just isn't the place to have people pver anymore, at least when my step mom is home. She couldn't trust any of my friends and treated them like animals, we wern't allowed to eat inside. Bees were attacking us and friends would scream OH DUDE! and she would be mad. This really is a disapointment. My first year I'm not having a party. This really sucks, I mean, this really sucks. It all comes back to my step mom... why is it she's always involved in screwing up my plans, pretty much my life. Jeez Cheez

// Steph Goes Bye, Fred Goes Hi

As I speak, Brendon and Stephanie ar no longer in Canada, and Fred is at the airport, or on his way home. Exciting! It shouldn't be hard with no Steph and Brendon, although I will miss their pool. haha! joke. Anywho, yay! Fred is coming home!

// pictures!!

Hey guys.

Matt wants some picture-like profile links like I got on ranDOMinion. So y'all arrange somehow to give me a photo of yourself. And if you can't, then you suck, and that is the end of it.

But really, you suck.

NO. Really. You suck.

Haha ok i was only kidding all three times.

But really, gimme photos. And I will make the blog "pretty". Why'd you ask me to do it anyways?? Steph is far better at this. My skills are petty compared to hers'.

If you's gonna e-mail it, make sure the file's no bigger than 200kb or I will BALEET IT! (homestarrunner.com for "baleet")

// One Of Those Days...

Have you ever had a day where you just want to rip your head of because minor things, that can be solved easily, are screwing with your head? And it just gets so annoying?

Today, and yesterday, would be one of those days. Not that I want your sympathy but I just feel like expressing this so that I don't shoot myself! Just kidding, the worst I would do is yell. But this had taken away any excitement I once had for Cultus...

There is this one verse I keep reading to myself though, which someone gave to me...

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight

Proverbs 3: 5-7

// wow i can't believe it

This summer has gone by like a flash flood. It's been full of emotions to say the least. I have learned lessons that will stick with me or the rest of my days. God has blessed me more than i could ever repay him, and he will continue to for the rest of my life. I have grown in many ways in such a short amount of time, and i can never go back to how it was before. I miss all of you very much, a chapter of my life has been stuck on a cliffhanger for the past little while. Hopefully you can help getting it started again. I will be praying for all of you theses last few weeks of summer, stay strong, for christ came and gave us life. If anyone wants to write me before i come home the address is:
Ben Appenheimer c/o
Keats Camps
Box 284
Gibsons BC
V0N 1V0
Please hurry with writing them, and keep in mind they take about five days to get to the island. May God's grace and mercy fall on all of you!!!

// It Still Bugs Me...

Let me ask you all a question. If your friend was doing something very important, would you be there to witness it? If your friend was in a championship hockey game, or any game, would you watch it? If your friend was about to put on the biggest show of their life, would you be their to cheer them on?

For me, the answer is yes, and I have proved my word. A couple of springs ago, I went to watch one of Matt and Nick's hockey games. They continuously invited me and I decided, yea, there my friends, lets go out and support them. Just a couple months back I went to go watch Stephanie's one act with Dyllan, which I think really made her feel great.

I bring this up because before I went to bed I found an old Bye Bye Birdie poster, my first ever major musical I was ever in, a professional student show. The thing that bugged me the most that not one friend from church came to see me. Not one. Pastor Andy came to see me, and it was still only his first week as being a youth pastor. Pastor Jade came to see me, and he barely sees me. But it made my day when I saw them, with Amrit and Sarah too. But I just wished that at least one friend could have come. There was not even proof of an effort from many (except for Steph, who wasn't allowed to go). But still, I was telling everyone months before, and there were six shows! It still bugs me... Could they not sacrifice one night and $7 for a friend? My two hockey buddy hates musicals, yet they came. And not once has anyone, besides me, watched my movie. I have attempted to, but no one wants to watch me for free now, let alone the $7.

I may be sounding selfish, but there really was no possible excuse for missing it. The excuses that would work if you were out of town, not allowed to go, or sick or something. Stephanie qualifies for that. But people like Dyllan, Matt, and Nick just didn't want to go. Coming from an actor, and a goalie, it really makes your day when a friend comes to give you a hug or high five after the show. Yet all I got was a high five from people I barely knew, or hockey buddies. I definitely would have preferred friends but when the tables turn, they just can't take the bullet for me.

// I'm Back!!

As many people at the Tsawwassen ferry terminal waundered why the Queen of Naniamo was late, nothing could be for sure. Was it because the cafeteria ran out of letuce? Was it because the captain had to go to the washroom for an extra long time? As I said, nothing could be for sure. The only thing the was for sure was that Matthew Robson and Dyllan Morgan were back on the mainland after a intense four day vacation.

Yes, I am back, and it is nice to sleep on a bed, since we didn't have foamies for our tent. Nevertheless, it was fun. We did mny things and I really did enjoy myself. Dyllan wanted to go back, but I was happy to be home!

Anywho, problems are already boiling up just as I get home, GREAT! Ok, Thursday something happened to my alarm. I don't know what, but bottom line, it didn't go off. I rushed my way to work but I was still 20 minutes late, which made my boss very unhappy. aI had no excuse, I didn't want to put the blame on an alarm clock, so we continued on the day. I then finished up and I was payed. Things seemed to be ok, right? WRONG! His wife, who is my step moms sister was talikng to her and aperintly he was still mad, and the "way he said it" I was late every single day. What? I was late Thursday! I didn't mean to! Why would I want to be late. So I got in trouble, had a talking to, and was relieved that I didn't have to work tomorrow. I was dead tired and I figured I could use a long sleep in. I clearly remember him saying "I'll Call You If I Need You In Monday". It was Sunday night, 10pm, sweet! I don't have to work! A day off would be nice. I wake up this morning, theres a message. He wants me to come in! I would have to have been there at 9 and he calls me at 8:10. Thats a little unfair wouldn't you say? But he sounded doughtful that I would come in and he said if your going to come, then come. Since I needed this day off, I decided I won't come in, and if he's mad, so be it, you don't call someone the morning you want them to come in and expect them to be there. I'll have an excuse this time.

Isn't it great to be back home?

// What would Jesus do for a Klondike bar?

Anyone know what's up with this Friday night? I kind of doubt that we'll be going to THE Splashdown since it's listed as 7 PM and you'd usually go earlier in the day for a trip like that... right? Anyway, get back to me on that one.

I like sitting in parking lots with friends, blasting music at a reasonable level. Then, you turn around and pick up an imitation Oreo off the ground of the car and throw it into the next car where the occupants are surely swapping spit. It's amusing to make fun of them. But of course, we all know people who make fun of PDA'ers are just lonely. Yes, I am lonely. Actually, not really. I have friends to keep me amused. Which makes me wonder. What's up with teenage relationships? Why so much effort? I mean, there's a huge number of married couples who can't make things work, why should teenagers start jumping the bandwagon? This is one of the reasons why I have yet to have a boyfriend. It doesn't bug me though. Enjoy being young. It doesn't last too long. (This isn't to say I wouldn't mind a special someone. I'm just lazy...ish.)

Forget everything you just read. It's late and I don't make sense. Oh yah, LAUREN COMES BACK FROM EUROPE TOMORROW!! Someone enlighten me. Is there a way to write letters to Ben Appenheimer while he is at camp? Or e-mail? Or something?!

// Summer 04

I haven't posted for a while, pretty much since crazy week. I can't really think of things to say, since my head is cloged with stuff, but I have been having the time of my life. I really have. I think this is, I don't know, I'm so filed with emotion and... Ahhhhhhhh, i don't know. I love you all