// Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend

Every time Sam comes over he downloads a bunch of crap onto my computer, but he does sometime leave a few decent things. Right now I've got How To Save a Life by The Fray playing and a pretty good song Sam has left.

The week has been dark... Seriously, I wake up at 7pm! I just don't feel like waking up, and I even went to bed fairly early today! It was like... 7:30? Better then 9 which is what I've been averaging this week. Anyhoo, it's Friday for me! Woohoo! And payday! Surprisingly I'm not very excited about it, but you can't really get too excited about much when 9pm is still your morning.

Anyhoo, bored waiting to go to work, was just taking a look at last years November posts and I read about how crappy life was. I don't know what happened that day, but looks like it had me pretty mad or something. However, the most intriguing thing was my job shadowing at SRY! I talked about how I didn't really enjoy it and it was hard work and blah blah blah... Who would have thought that a year later I'd be doing that very job. It's bearable now, but waking up at 7pm isn't much fun. I mean, I'm sure I could wake up earlier, but I don't set my alarm and I just sleep the day away.

Looking back at all my old posts, it seems that I've never had a really happy streak longer then two months for the past, what, 2 years? I'm looking back and that's annoying me! Seriously! When you look back and see that you haven't been able to enjoy yourself it annoys you!

What's up me? Why don't you enjoy yourself?

I have been able to enjoy myself, but it seems it only lasts in streaks of up to at least three months. I really thought I had turned a corner back in April, and I was doing well through May and even June, but then I started working and it went downhill from there.

So anyhoo, those times were more depressing. I like to look at myself right now and not say I'm depressed, just a little confused. People say I don't appreciate what I have, but I truly do. I have money, wealth, and everything that comes with it.

I think my problem is that I just sit and wait for things to change and eventually everything will just work itself out. I think I still do think like that, as I figure that this state of being confused will just pass.

If you're confused with a math question, you ask for help though right? You just don't leave it or else you fail. Hahaha! That would explain why I was so terrible at math! Hmmm, a resemblance?

Anyhoo, I'm going to have to jet to work pretty quick here, and I have yet to eat. Just to let you know, if any of you are thinking of getting my a Christmas present, get me a cook book! Like a 15 minute meal plan thing! I must waste tons of money on fast food, even though its been Subway lately! Still, no excuse!

For now, eggos!

Flyin' mother nature's silver seed
To a new home in the sun