// If God is a DJ...

I've been the girl with her skirt pulled high,
Been the outcast never running with mascara eyes.
Now I see the world as a candy store,
With a cigarette smile, saying things you can't ignore;
Like Mommy, "I love you,"
Daddy, "I hate you,"
Brother, "I need you,"
Lover, "Hey, f*** you,"
I can see everything here with my third eye,
Like the blue in the sky.

If God is a DJ,
Life is a dance floor,
Love is the rhythm,
You are the music.
If God is a DJ,
Life is a dance floor,
You get what you're given,
It's all how you use it.
Pink - God Is A DJ

So winter formal is in a week and a day. I'm stoked. I'm buying my ticket tomorrow. There's a song request list where you can write down one song when you buy your ticket, and I think I'm going to write down that one. God Is A DJ by Pink. I guess it's a theme song of sorts that keeps coming back in my life. Anyway, there are so many things that come with a grad event, and I wish I didn't have to deal, but I'm still going through all the motions. I guess even though I might not want to give the impression that I'm curious, I am. I just need to chill out, relax, and just cruise into winter formal and have a kick. Forget everything else.

I guess that's life, eh? Everyone is born, they get high-strung, relax a bit just in time to enjoy the rest of their life before they die. But it's a good life. I've been blessed with a breath in my lungs every morning, all my limbs (including both thumbs - very important), awesome friends and family, semi-above average intellect and appreciation of the arts, mentors who have taught me lessons that I will keep for all of this lifetime and beyond, enough talent to keep myself amused, a sense of humour to entertain others, and just to be here, on this earth. (That was totally a run-on sentence.)

Even just standing in the cold, with the rain running down your face is peaceful. Yeah, there's drama in everyone's life and everyone has a story that could break your heart, but in the end, we're all human. We all make mistakes, but we've all been saved. We're all under the same sky with the same hope. We just need to be more grateful sometimes. And realize more things about our lives.

I see people at school who don't give a flying eff about anything 'cept sex, mary-jay, and drinking 'till they puke their freakin' guts out. That's no way to live a life that has so much potential. I'm glad I've got Christian friends to hold me accountable for my actions and I'm glad I can be there to support them and hold them accountable.

Like Matt reminded us in the previous post, everything in life happens for a reason. Though we might not want to acknowledge that, we need to respect it. It is God's plan and things will turn out well in the end. Sometimes I think about everything that happened at the end of summer, and I honestly sometimes want to cry and smash things and scream at the world. I want to get frustrated. I want to be hurt. I want an excuse not to be responsible. But that's life. Things change and lovers will come and go. But I'm okay with that. I don't regret all the happenings and events at the end of summer. They taught me something.

I learned that love really isn't as common as most people make it to be. And that what most people think is "love", really isn't. What I had was love in every sense of the word that I could understand at the time. How could it not be? And I'm glad that it was who it was, because it was a time and a relationship that I will remember for the rest of my life. One day, I'll probably tell that story over and over again to my own daughter. But that one chance that you get to spend the rest of your life with that one special person, take it. I don't mean marriage, but if there is someone in your life that you want to keep around for the rest of your life, do it. Work at it. I want to keep my bestfriend around forever because he is honestly one of the best people I have ever known. He makes me laugh; he makes me happy. SO HAPPY. I don't even know why. I just know it's beyond what I could ever explain to anyone. I love that guy.

God, it just feels good to be alive.